Updated: 9/04/2024
This is How You Can Become Emotionally Strong
Emotional strength is one of the most valuable traits one can have. Life is not always easy and the times we are currently in do not particularly make it easier for many of us to stay emotionally balanced. Yet, it is attainable and sustainable but it does take practice. Unfortunately, emotional strength is achieved through going through some upheavels first before there's light after darkness. However, luckily it is these experiences that teach us how to handle difficulties and let us figure out ways to come up with useful solutions. You simply learn new ways on how to cope with challenges each time you encounter a difficult situation and as a result, you become emotionally stronger.
That said, there is no other way around it than needing to have experienced certain things and learning how to handle them, to ultimately get to that emotional stable place. You will notice that the people who have peaceful and strong minds are those who have gone through life’s battles and faced some opposition in their lives. I personally also believe that in order to be emotionally strong, certain skills must be learned and attained. Anyone can learn these skills as long as you are motivated to learn, just like learning how to read or ride a bike. It’s moreover a skill that is worth learning about since the stronger your state of mind is, the better you are able to navigate and enjoy life and also the more proficient and successful you will be. Let's not forget that the mind is a very powerful tool and it is your strongest asset.
The reason why meditation is so powerful, is because it teaches you how to become present; to become fully aware in the moment without giving thought or emotional response to your environment, thoughts and feelings. It is not meant here by the word “meditation”, that you should sit still on your bed or mattress in a lotus position for hours. You can learn the art of meditation at any place and any time by simply practicing full body, mind and soul awareness through the skills I've just mentioned. By practicing this more and more, you start to understand that you are not the ego but the awareness that is behind the ego. When you understand that on a deeper level, you truly start to gain emotional strength and power and increase the amount of control you have over your life's destiny. The power in understanding that the ego is not your true self and acting on that knowledge is emotional strength. Most people are simply not who they think they are. They associate their true selves with their thoughts, which stem from their emotions, while those in itself stem from past (life) experiences. Thus, when you start to unconsciously define and link your present emotions and thoughts to a certain personality you've always been familiar with, you are potentially playing a dangerous game. The key to solving this issue is awareness, by which you can develop emotional fortitude.
Recognizing the differences between the ego and the true self is vital because only in doing so, you are able to rationalize and neutralize what is going on inside your mind and prevent yourself from seeing or creating problems where there weren't any in the first place. As a matter of fact, the truth is that most of the time there are no real problems in the “now”. The real problem is that we often tend to project our fears and worries about the future or bad experiences from the past into the now and we identify with them. That is how many people keep finding themselves stuck in a continuous cycle of feelings of unworthiness and emotional dissatisfaction - because they are unknowingly recreating the past by focusing on it! This is where learning how to separate your thoughts and emotions from the egoic mind comes in and how you can create emotional equilibrium within yourself by doing that practice. While this might not be the easiest thing to do in the beginning depending on your own present state of consciousness, just like learning anything new, in time you will get better at it as results naturally start unfolding.
As you get into a state of observation rather than reaction, unwanted thoughts and feelings start to slowly dissolve, until they eventually almost disappear completely. You will also start to obtain what they call a “flow state”. This is where you have gained great control over your egoic mind and where you master this mind instead of it dominating you. Once having successfully obtained this state, peace and harmony start flooding your consciousness and will make their way in all areas of life. Daily life and its challenges also become much easier to deal with when you have mastered a state of flow. Whatever difficulty or opposition shows up, you will be able to handle it with a lot more ease and comfort.
Lastly, attempt to achieve a state of conscious observation throughout the day, instead of living unconsciously on autopilot because that will drive you further away from emotional strength or discipline and will most likely cause you to attach yourself to undesirable circumstances and situations. This is because you are not being present and because you are not present, you are not fully being conscious. You have to sit back for a moment so to speak and watch your thoughts and emotions and how you react to them. Do your thoughts make you angry, upset , ashamed or fearful? What drives these thoughts to occur? Is your mind stuck in the past or are you constantly projecting possible undesirable outcomes about the future into the now? Remember that the future has not yet been created but is brought forth by what we focus on in the present. When you become aware of these thoughts and your reactions to them, you can make them disappear by simply making them conscious. By doing so, you become aware that they only are what they are: “thoughts”. Now you have separated the thoughts that were created by the egoic mind from what is happening in actual reality. That is how you can gain control over your emotional state and become an emotionally strong individual, with a true vigorous power over thém.