Updated: 9/3/2024
Dealing with Loneliness - Why it Happens and How to Cope
We all stumble upon times in our lives when we feel lonely. However sometimes feeling lonely isn't actually a bad thing. It's when we learn more to depend on ourselves, rather than our outside environment. Often times we then discover more of who we truly are and what our purpose is. Loneliness cán be a downfall if you don't know how to deal with it and aren't spiritually inclined to understand that this is happening for spiritual growth.
There are times in life when actually you need to be by yourself. It's a time you might experience loneliness, but we all go through it because it is necessary to learn who we truly are and to figure out how we proceed further in life.
You can be surrounded by friends and family and still feel lonely. Do you sometimes experience loneliness while you're with people you love and care about? It is not really a rare thing. You got to ask yourself "where is this loneliness really coming from?".
We are all social creatures with the inner need to connect with other people. It is a mistake to think that most humans prefer a solitary life. Almost every one of us feels best when we can have actual and good interactions with other people. Society these days makes some of us believe that we must be independent people (which I agree with to a certain extent), but also that it is a weakness to show vulnerability.
Loneliness is a topic that most people who go through don't like to discuss or address. Often due to shame and feeling unworthy. It's a reality that everyone gets to experience; even the ones who say they don't ever feel that way for whatever reason, do feel lonely at times.
Do you believe you are a "loner" or "deserve" to be by yourself?
Your previous experiences have the natural tendency to shape your current thinking and beliefs. The reason you feel lonely could be because you have a certain belief f.e: "no one wants to hang out with me" or "I am not worthy of having lots of people around me", "I am not smart enough" etc. These beliefs often come from past (traumatic) experiences.
When you think these thoughts over and over in your mind, your subconscious starts to see it as something that's true. When you constantly affirm these thoughts, you give out that energy of you experiencing loneliness and what you will get is only more of experiencing exactly that. If I would think and tell myself continuously "no one wants to hang out with me", what I am creating is the low vibrational energy that reflects that back to me; meaning people don't want to hang out with me.
Why loneliness at times is necessary for our mental and spiritual growth
Loneliness is sometimes necessary for all of us to develop in many new ways to become the best version of ourselves. Most of the people you meet are just there for a chapter and a role to play in your life. To either teach you something or to add value to your life. (In a way, everyone adds value to your life, since we all learn from each other.) Everything happens for a reason and everything happens for a greater purpose; there's no such thing as things being coincidental.
When something falls away from your life, don't worry too much, since it was never meant to stay anyway. What we lose in time tends to get replaced in something of similar value, some way or another. Always trust your path and divine timing, because everything and everyone comes in at the right time when it's supposed to happen. Just don't get stuck in negatieve beliefs that you will forever be by yourself or that you are somehow unlucky to be alone.
If you feel lonely and you're spending a lot of time by yourself, be aware that this is a time of transformation. You are feeling this way because now is a time to work on yourself, to work on the best version of you. It is an important thing to remember that it is a time of transformation, but also a time to acknowledge the fact that you are a co-creator of your own reality and that you manifest your entire existence.
Knowing that you are the creator of your reality means that you can also turn around the not so happy circumstances to your advantage and use your alone time to become wiser and stronger.